No More Mr. Nice Guy!

Well hello there......crazy seeing you here. As the title of this blog implies, after this blog posting there will be no more Mr. Nice Guy. I will, of course, always be a nice guy, but this will be a final goodbye exit entry to this attempt at a blog. I think the reason is obvious as evidence by my non-posts in three months, and perhaps I will pop back on again from time to time, but I couldn't just go out on a lame note like I had and I wanted one more chance to say something to all. I thought today was also an appropriate day to post because today marks exactly one year since I landed in California to start this new life. It has been quite an eventful year full of ups and unfortunately a few more downs, but life is getting back on track and I can only optimistically look ahead to the year to come. But without any further hesitation, here's what I've got for you after three months of rumination and thoughtful insight:

• Three months ago (97 days and 24 minutes ago to be exact) I was reunited with Mrs. Nice Gal after so many long months apart. Those truly were some of the most difficult moments of my recent life and I can't even begin to express how much more complete and alive I feel to have her back in my life. Coming home each day is a treasure now knowing that she is there and every moment we spend together is full of exploration and discovery both in this new area and within our own relationship and marriage. The separation definitely made 2008 one of the hardest years I can remember and the majority of it feels like a fading canvas, partially visible, but unattached from any true sense of visceral appreciation. Now that we have been reunited every moment feels more real and I greatly look forward to all the new adventures that we have in the days and years to come.
  

• The job at "The Company" has also been a challenge and perhaps the greatest hurdle in my adaptation to the new life out here. One things I can say for certain is that I in no way knew the learning curve that faced me when I took a job in feature production. Coming from commercial production and FX, I knew the basics of what a large-scale feature house did, but I had a very limited knowledge of the pipeline and the actual technical know-all that went into each piece of work. It has been rough, and trying to learn things while moving at break-neck speed has not been easy. I know I am learning a great deal every day and will continue to grow, but I am also working with people that expect perfection from Day 1. There have definitely been some tense moments and I feel like I am constantly being watched for growth and improvement, which has not always made for a pleasant experience. I love film and I am really excited about the work that we are doing, but the very high expectations have made for a less joyous transition than I initially thought.
  

• In addition, one note I can say about the place in New York where I came from before "The Company" is that despite the never-stop hours (far worse than anything I have had to deal with out west) and the relentless overly demanding clients, the New York company was a "family". While there may have been a few people who were off-their-rocker crazy, New York hired good people. I find that "The Company" tends to hire people who are good at their jobs first well above the hiring of good people. I'm not saying that all of the people I work with aren't nice, and maybe it goes to a much larger issue that I am discovering between New Yorkers and Californians, but I do find a lot of behind the back gossip, unwillingness to help out, and political game play. It's unlike what I went through before and doesn't always make for the best work environment. Darn the trade off; complete non-creativity, non-stop hours and aggravating clients with good co-worker vs. awesome work and feature films with some co-workers I don't necessarily trust. Hmmm......

• As for some quicker thoughts: The Election of '08 was fantastic and although the Laker-meter of deciding election results can no longer be applied, it was one of the best moments in our country's history. Now if only our new President can keep his promises, further his message and make positive change in this country. Only time will tell and only a true patriot will be able to do what is needed while avoiding being corrupted by the regularity of politics.
  

• Wow! What a Super Bowl! After a weird football season that didn't truly feel like it belonged, we as football fans were rewarded with one of the best Super Bowls (and best Endings) of all time. Albeit if the game did have to have the Arizona Cardinals in it.

• Now that Mrs. Nice Gal is here, the next step is for her to get a job. As mentioned above, it has been 97 days and she is still vigorously on the search. Unfortunately and unplanned her move timed exactly perfectlly with the wort economic period our country has faced in nearly 75+ years. Now that she has all this free time on her hands, it may not be much longer before the Mrs. Nice Gal Blog comes online.
  

• As for the move in whole, it is very hard to judge whether this was the right option that will lead to great life growth (as initially thought), a terrible mistake that will lead to regret, or somewhere in between. I would have to say that at this point, any review of the move would have to be given an Incomplete. As I mentioned, this past year has not seemed fully realized. My first three 1/2 months were spent job searching, my first eight months were spent without my life partner, and the past three months have been the start of something new, but while Mel is at the beginning of this new journey, I am somewhere down the road waiting for her to catch up. I think we will sync up soon (once she gets a job and we can truly explore this beautiful region) and I think work will get better as I continue to learn and grow, but for now I am feeling only partially there still yearning to see the fullness of the potential ahead.

As for my above question, the answer is probably somewhere in between. I think I probably set way too lofty goals in the move and have come to learn that life is life regardless of the coast and that a job is still a job regardless of whether you are selling cell phones or cute fuzzy creatures. All that ends up mattering is how you live each day and makes me think of a blog entry I always intended to write, but never did about the spontaneity of the moment. A thought that came up once while watching some children just jump around, climb on benches, fling themselves to the ground and do whatever came into their mind was that these kids were purely happy doing whatever moved them in the moment of life. Here was life and happiness living in true and pure spontaneity. Society and culture has trained us for so long as we grow older to follow by the dictates of preset rules. We are directed towards doing what is expected of us, to always draw within the lines, to never jump up on a bench on a wim, and never throw yourself around because of the joy it will bring. Moving doesn't change these rules and in all honesty, the world of production only goes to further strengthen these rules. But alas there is still such great potential for discovery down the road if I can remember the joy of each moment, the message of Optimism Prime, and the purpose that I sought out with when making this journey of manifest destiny. Tomorrow I will wake up and do it all again but I will know for certain that for a moment I broke from the dictates of the rules, picked up and sought a chance of what could be by moving out west to fulfill my life dream. Maybe I will come to find that this dream is still to be unearthed, but regardless of the end, I know that I took a chance in a moment of spontaniety that will always be with me and always be free of regret. So now I move foward into year two of this crazy Californian adventure not knowing what to expect, but I do know that I now have my love and life partner by my side, I know that I took a risk that can't be taken, and I know that no matter what.....I will always be a nice guy.

Thank you all for visiting this site, I'm sorry about the lack of updates and I wish you all the joy in whichever dirction your futures take you. Blog with you........well.........you never can tell now, can you.

-Nice Guy SMA-