The Return of Optimism Prime

Ok…..I’m a dork. I know that and if you’re reading this blog, you probably already know that too or at the very least are quickly learning that fact.

For many years, I would have considered myself the eternal optimist. I always felt that things would work out for the best and that life would turn in a positive direction. I was a happy child, constantly curious, but also content in the surroundings that I had been given. I knew that the future would be bright and tried my hardest not to worry over the small stuff.

In college, I tried to continue my optimistic trend. I was happy, go lucky, but I was also becoming more aware of the world around me for better and for worse. As my awareness of global politics grew, I began to see the inequities of the world and the issues that people less fortunate than myself faced. This awareness began to seep into my own emotions, but I tried as hard as I mightily could to not let this growing understanding affect my outlook on my own daily issues. Then 9/11 occurred. I don’t want to dwell on this for any longer than I already have, but that day plus my own impeding graduation into the real world definitely had an impact on my daily view.

I became more of a cynic, outwardly proclaiming the failings of the world and seeing little to be positive about. My own political persuasion became more pronounced causing me to decry the current situation and the shining optimism that I once had morphed to a degree. I still felt that things would work out for me, but this belief was now based on my own confidence and arrogance, if you will, than on an optimistic belief that things would simply work out.

After graduating, I also moved to New York City. While I do love the city very much, New York is a very “real” place. That’s what makes it so charming, but also what makes it so tough. The city is not, in my opinion, for dreamers. The city is gritty, the city is honest, the city is realistic. You know who you are, and you know what others think about you immediately. Things in New York work out because you make them work out, not because there is a greater force giving a little push.

While there, I worked for a company where the pertaining wisdom was to assume that everything others did was wrong, and to make sure you do it right. Good advice for someone in production, but definitely a draining way to live life. Every day was hard; it wore on me and wore on my soul. My matrix was removed and I felt my spirit fading to grey. (Who else is a dork and understood that reference!)

Well, now I have moved! It is my goal to use this move to change the way I view my daily life. I understand that there are a lot of problems in the world and in our own society, but I am re-learning how to separate my awareness and my desire for altruistic change from my own personal and internal feelings. I am once again stopping to enjoy a “joyful” moment each day and using that to fill my daily outlook. I find myself smiling again, slowing down to enjoy things, and not worrying if certain specifics aren’t exactly how I would have scripted them. This has especially helped in the job search. I came out here thinking that I would be working by this point. Maybe just a year ago I would have been frustrated about my situation, angry in my actions, and negative in my daily view. Now I am trying hard to find the positive in each situation and know that things will work out for the best. Like the Autobot in Chief, I feel restored and I feel that optimism returning. Some days are easier than others, but ultimately I am remembering that there are many ways we can look at life, and feel that looking at life with a positive mindset helps to keep a smile on the face, and the day moving forward.

In the words of Dietrich Bonhoeffer:

“The essence of optimism is that it takes no account of the present, but it is a source of inspiration, of vitality and hope where others have resigned; it enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not to abandon it to his enemy.”

So to all of you, I hope you don’t let each day drag you down, and you keep a positive spirit in all you do. Just my thought, but one, that makes me smile. All my best and I will blog with you later.

-Nice Guy SMA-